Day 12 After the event

Today, I can have some jokes but immediately after the joking, there was some sense of guilt. I do not know why but this had caused me the whole morning with heart pain and uncertainty as well as restless. This does not get better till I visited you at the cementery.


I started to worry I would forget your face instead of photo and I force myself to remember your smiling faces. I am so afraid to have the memory of you faded but instead needed to be reminded with your photo. I am so worry! I would remind my kids of their mother's name, characters, things that you did etc everyday. I am so afraid with the grew up, they will forget you! I believed I might know why I cannot let go yet. It is because we did not discuss yet about this type of living without each other and we did not get enough of chatting. However, please be assured that I will handle all for you although I will need to go through the saddest feels of all.

Since your departure, I started to put on back the watch that you presented to me some 10 years ago. I can still remember that you had taken the trouble to go thru and fore to the shop with fund withdrawal for the purchase. It did not cost much and I remembered it should be around RM250/= but you were earning as little as only RM1000/=. This was 1/4 of your monthly income and you have given me your most thoughtful gift of all. The watch is still functioning great. I have other watches in my drawer but this one will definitely have my full attention as a memory to you. The watch reminds me of our living together.

I also have your favourite watch together with my watches collection. I remembered you like this watch so much and it was your birthday gift of 2006. This year, however i did not manage to have any gift to you but to accompany you at the hospital. I did not even can sing the happy birthday song to you..and can sing no more for now! It was just like yesterday!
But you also have given me the greatest gift of all...our two kids. Thank you Soo King!

I miss you, Soo King

Words are not descriptive to express my loves to you and I miss you every single moments..

My Beloved Wife, Soo King (1971 - 1990)

Childhood and primary school age (1971 - 1983)

Soo King was born in a small town called "Jeram" in July 29, 1971. I did not have chance to involve in her early childhood days but from the photos, Soo King already protraited herself as someone who was cheerful, charming and most of all pretty. It was easy to recognize her as there was some characteristic of her smiles which remain till now and forever in my heart. She was a brilliant student of SRJK (C) Jeram and I remembered she commenting to me that she was one of the top students who all teachers had been wishing she could perform really well in Ujian Penilaian at Standard 5 (1981). However, the results were not as expected and she cried. Since then, she invested her time in studies.










(1984 - 1989) Secondary School
Soo King had her secondary education in Sekolah Menengah Kampar since Remove Class (1984) till Form 5 (1989). She had been an active student in co-curicular activities as I remembered she telling me that she was the lead for St. john, librarian and prefect etc. She was also keen in performing in annual school activities with dances, plays etc. I did not have chance to view all of her performances as at this age, I still did not have the fate to meet her yet. Soo King had a group of good friends who are still in contact till now. And I am so cherish that majority of you turned up to withness and accompany the last episode of Soo King. I believed Soo King would know and appreciate all the times which you have been dedicated to her and she would always cherish the friendships with you all.
I was also informed that there were numerous of admirers and secret admirers to her at these days. She had not been bothered to anyone of them as she primarily focus only to her studies particularly for SRP and SPM. My dear wife was then awarded with 5A in her SPM for her hardship in studies while staying active in other school activities. I came to knew of Soo King in my Form 5 as I was told of her character and pretty. I only knew she was the "flower" of SMK at that time, as I was perhaps busy with my own preparation of SPM. We did not meet till Form six in 1990..



















Our destiny started in 1990
The fate of meeting Soo King finally began in 1990 when both of us were transferred to a similar school, SM Sri Kampar. However, we were still not knowing each others yet as we were in different classroom. I guess there must be fate for us to meet each others as the school made another arrangement to combine all the bio-maths students to one single class and we finally became classmate. Soo King was really quiet and did not bother to guys at that times. I could only stared at her back and admired her long hairs. I loved Soo King in long hairs and had her hairs tied up. All I could do was to stay close to two of her best friends so as to get her attention. It was really tough to break the ice with Soo King as I always felt kind of nervous whenever facing her. All practised speeches were useless but I believed because of my cheerful character which I can deliver laughters to surrounding friends with jokes and teases finally caught her attention.
I also acted very strangely in Form Six as I isolated my table from the rest and studied alone without bother the teacher. Soo King, you must remember well that I started the tackling you with boarding on the same bus with you (at a few seat back) to your house and requested to be your boy friend at the bus stop when I was going home hours later. But my Soo King really was a tough girl to win the heart with! You had been acting cool and not responding to my tactics which made me twisting my head for nights for love letters, gift, guitar, songs etc. I need to specially learned up some chords for guitar to sing some songs to Soo King. Both of us will always remember our love song is "Love me Tender" although I can only sing in a harsh voice but I remembered Soo King was smiling during the session.









Soo King had been well manner, patience, kind hearted, soft spoken and always cheerful with sweet smiles. She always had her long hairs tied up and attractive. Although I do not have chance to involve in those earlier ages, but I felt thankful as Soo King had been having a great youngster days with friends, laughters, joys and cheerish for lifes. Soo King also the sister of guide for all her brothers and younger sister. Her parents are always proud of Soo King with absolute no worry of her studies and arrangement of life. She planned well and ambitious in her life. It is my greatest gift and wealth to have a chance to meet Soo King in 1990 to ignite our love journey.