In loving memory of my beloved wife: November 2008

Day 86 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Sunday, November 30, 2008 comments (1)

Today I went to KL along with two others. The trip was meant for phone shop setup. In between of acquiring the phones and accessories, I still manage to locate some favourites for the kids. They were the Ben10 figures. I believed the kids would overjoy when they saw these on their table.

It was a fruitful trip as I learned quite a bit on the operation of the phone business.

Day 85 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Friday, November 28, 2008 comments (0)

Tonight I have the two kids back to their nanny's home. I was alone at the house and I was avoiding thinking about the moment with you, with the TV turn on showing the HK movies so I could divert my attention.

I walked to the third room which stored most of the souvenirs. I knew why I walked to this room. I was looking for a pairs of souvenirs I gave to you perhaps 8 years ago. They were the pair of "Hello Kitty" in marriage suites. I remembered I had these purchased on my way to Kulim in the lunch time. You had kept these till today and indeed you had kept all the gifts I had to you.

Day 84 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Thursday, November 27, 2008 comments (0)

Today was another non-productive day for me as for the whole week. I did not seem to be in interests of performing. My mind was basically restless and could not concentrate. The days were filled with tasks and I could have been busy resolving those tasks, but I just not at all think of them. But to lag on.

The household chores had not been followed up well too. I had not been sweeping the floor since Monday. I had not water the plants since last week and I could see some have started to turn into yellowish. And one of the plant you left me had "died" but I did not know the reason as I had been watering it and put it to shelter ever since I notice it was drying up. You like this plant as it always has red/orange "fruits". I felt kind of sad when it finally left me too. It is a sight of my ignorant recently. Dear, please forgive me.

I will re-invest my time in all these household chores and gardening.

Day 82 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Tuesday, November 25, 2008 comments (0)

The economy is getting worse and bad news come once after another. Respective parties have been fighting with reinvestment/rescue plans, incentives, contigency measures etc. Job cutting seems to be an unavoidable measure soon by most company.

But you do not need to worry as I will ensure the kids still have the right education allocations, amble of petty cash for daily needs etc. However, I will indifinitely cut down their expenses in toys. I will convince them not to spend more on their monthly allowence but to save up for future usage. Rest assure that no matter how tough the life challenge is going to be, I will stay with them and offer the best to them as my promise to you.

Day 79 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Saturday, November 22, 2008 comments (0)

The little one has brought home a bear that he used to carry all the times. It was indeed a replacement bear of his favourite which lost at Jusco at a night outing. He was crying sadly after the lost. You had indeed immediately tried to locate back the same bear for him. You had first bought the Mr. Bean's bear to him but he was never like the idea of a replacement bear. At a night shopping, we had indeed located a rather similar appearance bear for him. It was close to it but not quite. Since then, he never like the idea of carrying a bear... A lost is a lost. It can never find a replacement no matter what.

Day 77 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Thursday, November 20, 2008 comments (0)

Today the little one passed me a packet of cookies. There were the cookies made by him at the nursery. He shared me the cookies making process and he was eager to show me his success. At this moment, I thought if you were around, you will be grinning happily. I believed you will know he indeed has grown up a lot!

Btw, I had forgetten to show how he was queuing up at the nursery. He is always obedient and active. You always like to watching him running.

Day 76 after the event

Voice of KM Chong comments (1)

It has been quite some times since I last blogging... I do not forget. Last night, I had a strange dream. A really strange dream...

The night was cold and I believed it was drizzling outside, just like the day you left. I felt cold even inside the blanket.I am always could not sleep soundly and I believed I was half aslept. I "saw" myself in the dream. I saw myself looking to something. It was a hologram-like protrait at front of me. The hologram was your face. I was trying to touch you and trying to see clearer at the hologrom. The hologram had no color but only black and white. It really protraited as you... I tried to "look" to the hologram and to myself at the dream, but I could not really make up the clarity. A while later, all vanished and I awaked..

Was it really a dream?

In another occasion, some of my friends asked why I would want to blog and write down these but rather to keep personal to myself. I did not answer. The reason why I blog and continue to blog about Soo King and me is that these were the only memory that we both remembered and there will be no second person who will be able to chat with me on every single details of the events which we had gone through. Not even my sons or another others will be able to know the reason of why I cried just by looking at at piece of paper with writing etc. Before I lost all memory pieces by pieces due to age, I would want all of these to be recorded forever. These will be my companion when I awaiting my times later. It is this reason that I will blog and continue blog about our past and my venture of life later.

Day 68 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Wednesday, November 12, 2008 comments (1)

Today I went to the little one nursery for his second term progress assessment and feedback. I was not planning to attend to it as I felt that there should not be issues for the little one as he is smiling, playing and jumping all the while. At 11am, I decided to turn up for meeting the little one class teacher. To my shock, I was informed that the little one cried at the nursery for losing his mother... All these while, he has not been crying for the loss nor talking about the incident. I did not realize that there is already an impact to him that I did not notice. I was also informed that the little started ignoring the direction from teachers and doing badly on his works. These were in total contrast difference before the incident. The teaher also informed that the little one sometimes would be quiet at a corner and had his head buried in his arms with sadly faces. The teachers believed that he missed his mother...
I failed. I had failed for not noticing his character change. I did not aware that the little one has felt the loss but not mention to me. I believed they had seen me crying for their mother and these had shocked them seeing me crying. I was not sensitive. I failed...

Day 67 after the event

Voice of KM Chong comments (0)

At night I drove to the University Teknologi Petronas for a phone delivery to a student. This was an unplanned delivery. But the delivery reminded me of an event... It was almost the same period of times where I drove to UTP with you accompany at night to collect the IPHONE.

The journey to UTP again filled with the memory of you. Both travels were about the same time, same clock at night. The only different was... I did not have you beside me but the kids are..

It was just like yesterday and I did not realize that it was already a year since we last travel in couple for phone..

You always accompanied me.. taiping, auto city, rawang, utp anywhere and you always with me.

Tonight, I hope you are beside me as well as the seat is virtually empty. Dear, you are with me, right?

Day 66 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Sunday, November 9, 2008 comments (0)

We began the Sunday with the little one "swimming" bath with the bath tub filled with his favourite toys. He always spend at least 10 minutes for this type of "swimming" bath daily nowaday while I would take this short duration for simple clean up task. The elder one would not joint him as he would always wanted to have the times spend on NDS or PSP. (P/S: I hope the images of the little one here would not be considered as child-pornograph or I would remove them)

We then had our breakfast at the old town area. I always enjoy the noodles here with its special gravy. It was Sunday and the restaurant or even the streets were filled with cars and walking folks. I also showed the kids once the famous "second-wife" street. It was still special as there were clothes hanging across the building for sun drying with bamboo stick. I do not think I could see such practise anymore in a small city here.. I am wondering are there still second wife staying around here or just remain the name only... God knows!

After the breakfast, the kids wanted to have some shopping and so we dropped by to Parkson. Before we had the shopping, we also dropped by to the school for a special kids events. It was a nice event! At parkson, although it was still early at 11am but I would need to park the car at 4th floor and need to park far away from the entrance. What a Sunday! Everyone come up for shopping?? The only place that the kids want to spend time was the book store. I did not know if they could really read and understand but I always glad to have them browsing books.

We reached home at 2pm and the kids already exhausted and now sleeping soundly.. They are my cute princes!

(p/s: photo were taken with low quality iphone camera)

GMobile

Voice of KM Chong Saturday, November 8, 2008 comments (0)

Today in the initial design stage of the logo. It will be named GMobile or Green Mobile...Whether it will take shape as planned still require a lot of sweats and brain. Dear, you are with me, right!

Day 65 after the event

Voice of KM Chong comments (0)

I had stopped blogging for a while the entire week as I would like to test myself. I am testing myself if I could stay away while not thinking about you. Apparently, my thinking and emotional still easily be influenced. I am still feeling lost. And it is weird that I only cried at day time while not the night. I managed to get myself controlled as only cried while I was driving alone during the lunch...

Today I brought the kids to visit you. The kids were complaining that I did not bring them to see you as I dropped down the frequency to once a week. But I know you are with us all the while. I attached here the kids latest photo while they were having their breakfast today. Btw, the elder told me that he ranked as fifth in the class for the entire year. What do you think, dear?

Day 60 after the event

Voice of KM Chong Monday, November 3, 2008 comments (0)

Today I decided to purchase back another set of Apple Iphone. I do not choose the Iphone 3G or later version of first generation Iphone with 16G, but the very first limited edition of 4G... Reason being it is cheaper...No, this was not the reason. I could definitely afford for the 16G Iphone 3G but I do not want to have it.

The iphone reminded me of your accompany with me to collect the pricey Iphone at USM Tronoh site. We drove through quite a long distance although it was really a short distance trip as we used the Batu Gajah way instead of the Jelapang way. We drove through the mining area, the construction site and it was dark with no street light. We were driving with your little Spark car and by the time we reached USM, it was almost an hour later. We collected the Iphone and this was also the phone that you could remember whenever you see the same type. You always the one who accompanied me..

I treasured the iphone for one month plus before I shuffled it(longest duration of phone on my hand) but I still have all the contents kept in my PC. Most importantly, it contained the photo of you. It was shown whenever you called me. You were in red shirt and co-incidently whenever I had a new trial phone and wanted to take you a photo, you would be in the same shirt. I always teased you for this.. I could always get another Iphone, but not with you any more. This will be forever as memory..

Ben 10 and Wilson

Voice of KM Chong Sunday, November 2, 2008 comments (0)

The little one is now 90% recovered from the illness but has significantly slimmed down. It would be always obvious for him as his chappy face would disappear whenever he is ill. I brought him for the morning grocery shopping today and he would run around freely as usual. This marked he is doing fine. The elder one dressed in his favourite Ben 10 clothes and this always made the little one jealous. He repeatedly complaining that he would need one as well. I had promised him and will definitely need to find time to shop for his size.

Day 59 after the event

Voice of KM Chong comments (0)

I had been not blogging for the past 4 days as I was virtually and physically exhausted and I still not being fit enought for daily tasks yet. I did not visit the physician as I always used to self diagnose myself. I knew myself was kind of heat up internally and so I needed to release the heat with drinking a lot of "cool drink" according to chinese way of medication. I also believed part of the reason the little one being infected could be due to my own illness. I could have the carrier of illness... My apology, my little one!

Today I re-shuffled the living hall to make way for a more space. I always wanted the living hall to be simple and spacious. I hope you will like the way I had re-arranged. It looked pretty spacious now. Tell me what do you think, ok?

The aquarium also infected as all the fishes were killed. It had not been once but more than three times. I did not know what could be wrong but could be the location was not suitable for keeping the fishes. I would need to observe again. Nevertheless, the ponds at the car porch are filled with new lifes as there are plenty of little guppies now. These would mark the first time I could have little guppies. I also discovered that there are little shrimps as well. All of these could not survive inside the house but outside. I do not know why!

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