In loving memory of my beloved wife

I did not have any dream. It could be the night that I slept till morning without awaken. I was almost too lazy to get up till the clock stroke at 7.40am. Reluctantly, I prepared myself to the office..I stared at your photo without any words and you were smiling to me everytimes I looked to your photo beside my bed. I believed my emotional was rather quite controlled as I managed to get through the first night of being alone inside this house; a house with full of memories of yours. But I knew you were beside me.

I was in office while someone dropped me a letter. It was a letter from two colleagues in Sunnyvale. I did not meet them before but I have some emails exchanged with them before. I opened the letter. It was hand written and contained US100. I had been not reading any hand written letter for so long.. may be for more than 15 or 20 years. The letter made me cry again inside my own office..They wished me to stay strong for the kids.. It was so touching and the letter traveled over ten thousand miles to convey the message. Although the letter traveled slowly to reach me as compare to email, the message was signficantly meaningful than any emails. I would keep the letter and I believed wheneve I would felt blue and down, I would read it again. Thanks to both of the writters.

I suddenly realized that I have more cries and tears in this month alone as compare to my whole life. I would not normally cry. Not even when I was detained by immigration during the last trip to US due to some un-resolved case. But ever since you left me, I become so emotionally and simply could burse into as a tears-man. I wanted to control, but I still could not resist the depression raid yet. It was not the loneliness felt that made me cry.. but it was because I felt terribly depressed as you could not be with us and see the kids together. I knew you loved them and wanted to see them grow up and settled down. I knew your only worry was them; if they can live on and be successful in live. And for this one, I would promise to you, I will ensure I will take great care of them and all your worries will be mine and I will handle. You did not need to worry at all, dear! I will handle.