In loving memory of my beloved wife

It marked you had since left us for a month now. It wasn't too long but I felt like ages. It was really a difference without you. I had used to stay alone (due to work) for some period of times during travel (5 months being the longest away from home alone). We only stayed together after moved to Penang(2002 - 2004), Arizona(2004 - 2005) and Ipoh(2006 - 2008) with buying a house. Throughout 1998 - 2001, I had been the frequent driver on road every weekend rushing back to see you and the kid. I would pack ready by every Friday to drive back to hometown after work. I would stop at your house at Jeram for the Friday night and you always waited for my return without changes. I would only left for the work place on Sunday night. This had been the routine.

I had been telling myself, well, it would be just like this for temporary. I will eventually see you when I get to the deadend. you will be there to wait for me sometimes later. But, this thought does not work for me well.. I still miss you. Visiting you daily becomes my practise. Remembering our times together becomes my habit. Crying becomes so common to me..

Today, I started to worry for my health as the inner right ear pain eventually felt on every nights. You would remember that I had visited two different ENT specialists for this reason and yet did not get the right answer and cure. They claimed that because of the right joint had shifted slightly and thus causing a pressure onto the nerve and so the pain whenever I chew. But, today I found myself again with these issues again and the nose also had deposits and painful when touched. I observed that there were sores inside the nose. There had been some sight of Paranasal sinus and nasal cavity disease (1. A lump or sore inside the nose that does not heal. 2. Pain or pressure in the ear. 3. Nosebleeds. 4. A runny nose). I do not know when I will be prepared for a thorough check up yet. You would chase me for treatment if you were still around. But you also know I am stubborn on seeking medical advices. Is this the third disaster for me?