Today I did not cry. I am able to have some tease and joke. I start focus on my work although the concentration still stray aside with some thoughts. I still constantly have my eyes on your photo. Today I followed the grieving article guidance to send you an email. In the email, I had written the words I should be saying at front of you although I did mention them some times ago. But I just wish you could hear and read them again. I must apologize to you that I did not go visit you today as I was collecting the phone in hope I can retrieve the last photo of you...but the phone still cannot be turned on yet! I still cannot acquire your last snap of photo with kids! I am so sorry!
In yesterday meeting, I heard a great statement which I would remember for life. If we were to realize the statement, you could be still by my side now. "... when we are extending or stretching the lifespan of the design, we are typically increasing the probability of failure. No one will know when it will fail and it may not fail at all. There is only one person that know when it will definitely fail, The GOD!" I still blame myself on such. I still cannot let go on this matter of being responsible!
In the evening, I prepared the dinner for the kids.. It took me almost an hour to prepare a bowl of fried rices for the three of us. When you are around, I did not even need to bother what to cook but just to enjoy the meal you have prepared. I would just need to do the clean up. But more importantly, I did not enjoy the meal which I had prepared. I believed I missed the soup you had prepared!
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